Notice me Sempai

As our minds turn to the new year, our hope for a new better self becomes resolutions. We are all very conscious of how others view us so our thoughts turn to health and fitness.

 Our thoughts can become goals and our goals turn to reality if we listen to the right 'voice in our head'. Self coaching is key and communication; with ourselves or others is paramount to success in our relationships or achieving our dreams. I recently discovered this while trying to improve my abilities at communication in relationships.

The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose. 

William Shakespeare

In 'the cage' with Lucifer

We are our own worst enemies when it comes to sabotaging our relationships and our resolutions. In this story Ego is the devil and represents negative self talk. By changing frequencies it changes how we hear the messages in our heads.  Sometimes sacrifice is necessary, don't struggle with it embrace it and with the change is the reward. Train 30 minutes minimum most days. Make good food choices portion and supplement. Make sure its fun. Read books, watch videos, write, sing and laugh. When you can laugh at life you become less stressed. Above all eliminate negative 'self talk'.

Both the Devil and the Angelic Spirit present us with objects of desire to awaken our power of choice.

Rumi

On a good day, I can appreciate my journey. I can look in the mirror, see myself, and feel good about the steps I’ve taken, and even the steps I’ve missed along the way.

 Join our journey, learn the difference https://fearlessfamilymartialarts.com/classes/primal-fitness-kickboxing/

Afraid of the Dark

I can easily forgive a child that is afraid of the dark,

but not a person afraid of the light.

You Definitely don't fit the height requirement to ride this emotional roller coaster.
People have long known the road to success is not easy.
It is contingent on not quitting, just like fitness and Martial Arts.

It is better to have heart with out words than
to have words. without heart.
Don't just say it, do it.

Learned helplessness is the new social norm.
It's the belief that what ever you do doesn't matter.
Each of us has the capacity to make a difference.

Quitting is always the easiest way.
You are promised nothing but opportunity.
what you do with that opportunity is up to you.
It starts with genuine effort (heart) and a willingness to
Never, never, never quit.

I'm not foolish, using the knife from MY back, i've taken and
  severed the cord to the past and the why ?
There will always be foolish pretenders that will cross your path.

I remember one of my Karate instructors telling me we didn't need to learn 
how to fall or fight on the ground because our punches and kicks were so devastating.
Then came the U.F.C.

Second place is the first loser.

One of the things that always has cracked me up is when a girl or guy
tries too be a supporter of a sports team they know or care nothing about 
to try to be more 'supportive' in a relationship.
I think the saying goes 'Fake it till you make it'.

Really ?????

Relationships are  like sales .......
stay away from  politics, sports and religion.

 If you really possess the attributes to make a relationship work it'll work with out you 
FAKING IT !!!

In sales and Martial Arts, superior product knowledge is key.
A bottomless 'tool box' is an invaluable asset. 
In two weeks my boss goes on vacation with his family.
I am blessed with the opportunity of working with the V.P. of Sales
of my company for the weekend.

I've got more experience than he does X 2,
but there is a reason he's a V.P. of a $30,000,000. company
 and I'm only a sales mgr. 
This is an opportunity to look into the heart and mind of  
'stone cold, pipe hittin closer' !

Aproaching life with an open heart and an open mind, 
accepting rejection and making people feel important is key in sales,
 life, love and fitness / martial arts.

It's said the average person spends 5 hours a day watching the computer 
or T.V. each day, these same people don't have time to go for a walk,
go to the gym or Dojo. Get up, get out, get over it !

The devil is in the details.
Gathering of information is called discovery.
Knowing how and when to use what you've discovered is sales mastery.
Paying attention to detail in life / love without being reminded
 is seen as 'sweet' and caring.

A genuine leader leader is not a searcher for consensus
but a molder of consensus.

Martin Luther King Jr.

Hung like a Hampster, big around as a beer can.

We are so accustomed to hiding our true selves from others

 that we end up hiding from ourselves.

In some cultures it is a sign of status to have your earlobes stretched. 

I've seen this more and more recently.

 B.B.C. news says it is more prevalent over the last 5-6 years

 and that it's not just the 'tattoo and peircing' crowd that's doing this. 

Growing up I 'retooled' myself by going to the gym daily,
 running and cross training in various Martial Arts.
I suffered from low self esteem, these activities gave me confidence
and helped to repair my self esteem.

Fortunately for my kids, confidence is nurtured not genetic.

They excel in sports and social situations.

  For me it was a full time job of personal reprogramming

 that drove me to my various successes.

Raising the bar too high ?

How high is high enough ?

I remember Billy Major calling me from the Pittsfield Boxing Club.

My daughter Alli, had on her own, decided to train and spar at his gym.

 She was knocking out 18 year old boys at age 13 and won the Black Belt Division Grand Championship in fighting and forms at

 the Boston Nationals AS A BROWN BELT !!   

For my son Drew 'the struggle' was a little different.

Following the death of his step father Drew decided he wanted to be a lineman.

He applied, secured tuition and off he went.

For a guy with FEARLESS as an email he was no stranger to danger !

Apple   - Tree

Drew trains in kickboxing and regularly drags his butt to the gym.

He has fought as a teen in both the U.S. and Canada.

Joe Lewis would be proud...I know I am.

Now just come to Maine son....we need good linemen. 

Suellen had it tougher than the rest.

Her biological father has been 'run out of town' every where he ever worked.

 Suz loves her dad but has eclipsed his 'dark influence'.

It is so cool to see her 'work a table at a restaurant / bar,

consistently outselling her co-workers !!

Rock on Suz !!

Someone I used to know told me, that when she did catering work for extra money

she felt people looked down on her because she was serving them.

Ghandi said,

There is no shame in losing yourself in the service to others.

I think doing good things for, and helping others is the greatest measure of  personal excellence.

Living your life doing good things and leaving your 'mark' is your gateway to immortality.

Doing good for others heals us on the inside and the resulting 'ripple effect' 
causes us to speak, think and live in the affirmative.

Seasons in the Sun

I was on the runway, I was gonna make it.

I was gonna get too say goodbye,

Then Dennis called......He was gone.

Each day I begin by doing a weighted walk through the cemetery.

My way of cheating death each day.

I would like to make a toast to lying,

 cheating, stealing, & drinking.

If you are gonna lie, lie for a friend.

If your going to steal, steal a heart.

If your going to cheat, cheat death itself,

And if your going to drink, drink with me my friend.

Death is lifes' way of telling you your fired.

Three days after you die your hair and fingernails keep growing

 but the phone calls and texts taper off.

Death doesn't come to the living soul nor does age to the loving heart.

I don't know who said that but it's pretty damn romantic.

I'm binge watching 'Orange is the New Black' season two,
the lead character gets a furlough to see her dying grandma
only to find that the grandma is already dead. 

I'm thinking all of us are equally damaged
we cling on to faulty beliefs, or are guided by friends
who are equally damaged.

I'm a wordsmith, 
I've been to College, and I'm attending the school of life.

Through that I have come to the realization that
Myths and Fairy tales are designed to teach a lesson.

Unfortunately the modern versions have been 'scrubbed clean' for 
our modern consumption. A society that supports the notion of
trophies for all participants in childrens' sports,
  needs to believe in happy endings.

The 'real' stories are usually quite disturbing.
Take the brothers Grimm for example.

Sleeping beauty

A King hunting in the woods stumbles upon sleeping beauty and rapes her
then brings her home to one of his estates.
 she later bears two children who the Kings wife eats.

Little Red Riding Hood

Arrives at grandmas' house and eats her, takes her clothes off
then slips into bed naked where she loses her virginity to the wolf.
A French idiom for a girl having lost her virginity was
'elle avoit yu'      She has seen the wolf.

Cinderella

Cinderellas' sisters cut off parts of their feet to fit in the glass slippers.
Later their eyes are pecked out by Doves.

Rapunzel

Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair.
In the Grimm version of this story she does, a little too often.

Not with the prince though, with random beggars and thieves.
She winds up pregnant,begging in the streets.
  The witch cuts off her hair and transports her away.

We obviously live in a world of monsters and ghosts and things
 that want to steal your heart, it's not unreasonable to still have hope.
That's why Disney protects us by 'scrubbing' our stories for us.
So we can hold onto our belief  in  Angels, & Dreams 

The  'the goddess' was a myth.
Tinkerbell is now a truck stop hooker and
 Rapunzels' hair extensions are on the night stand of
a seedy roadside motel.......... not a castle.

Expectation is the root of all heartache.

-William Shakespeare-

The foundation we search for in Love, Life and Fitness is 
facilitated by our devotion to self, in the Dojo and the Gym.

We don't want to surrender  ourselves to the problem
rather than the solution.

Womens' intuition is a good signpost for decision making,
but it usually bumps up against mans' logic.

We have to put ego aside and listen.

The I-pod, gym, and Dojo can become an escape rather than a tool
if we are not careful to give significance to all aspects of our lives,

Why does the eye see a thing more clearly in dreams

than the imagination when awake ?

-Leonardo Da Vinci-

A Douche bags day in court

I think its funny that people who treat you like shit

 get offended when you finally do the same to them.

Former Lee police chief Joe Buffis on Wednesday denied charges of extortion, 

money laundering and wire / mail fraud in U.S. District court in Massachusetts.

This guy stole over $52,000. from a children's Christmas Toy Fund !!!!

Why do I care what happens to this DOUCHE BAG ??

This guy made my life a living hell when I was growing up .

He put in 'the system' that I was 'armed and dangerous'.

I would get randomly pulled over 'cuffed and stuffed' at gunpoint,

I would be made to wait in a cruiser while my car was searched.

Nothing was ever found - no charges were ever filed,

until a 'bitch' named karma reached out and 'cuffed and stuffed' him !

Be Good, Do Good !

 When a birds alive it eats ants,

when it dies ants eat the bird.

Time and circumstances can change at anytime

Don't devalue anyone in life.

You may be powerful today, but time is more powerful than you.

One tree can make a million matchsticks.

One matchstick can burn a forest of a million trees.

At the karma cafe' you'll be served what you deserve.

Karma has no deadline and she's a bitch.

It's a lie to say you have to let go of the past.

Nobody can let go of memories.

Each tear is an unforgettable memory.

Each smile is an undeniable mark.

Each heartbreak is an un-erasable scar.

There is no letting go, only moving on !!

For the innocent, the past may hold a reward. but for the treacherous

it's only a matter of time before time delivers what they truly deserve.

Everyone needs a super hero

A Product of Legends

The Batman meets The Beast !

 Sandy Hook shooting victim Dylan Hockley couldn't wait to move to America.    

            Out of school Dylan developed a love of martial arts.

He and his father, and brother Jake trained daily at Extreme Fitness Martial Arts.

Dylan had special educational needs and died in the arms of classroom aide Anne Marie Murphy, who desperately tried to protect him from the killer Adam Lanza.

http://fearsltd.blogspot.com/2012/12/cooler-than-supermandylan-hockley.html

 Martial arts study allows a special needs student to interact with others.

 Confidence is another great benefit to all, special needs or otherwise.

Martial arts promotes physical health and development of motor skills.

Martial arts study stimulates brain activity and benefits memory retention.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMf7jgopJXc

 

The video above is an ESPN profile of American Top Teams Garrett Holeve.

Garrett was born with  Downs Syndrome....

MMA training changed him ......

Watch it ..it may change YOU !

 

What matters most is not what's in the mirror,

It's in the view

Police pulled a man over on Route 29 in Silver Spring Md.

because of a problem with his plates.

The car was a black Lamborghini, the license plate was the Batman symbol,

 and the driver was Batman. 

The Caped Crusader is a businessman from Baltimore County..

 He visits sick children in hospitals.

 up-and-coming superheros trying to beat cancer.

 He's not Bruce Wayne, but Lenny B. Robinson,

As he left a little boy cried,

"I want to go help him fight bad guys,"

His mom said, "You need to stay here and help your sister fight cancer."

 Lenny and I spent time together in our nations capital and,

I'm proud to say Lenny B. Robinson is my friend and

 my hero ......

Heroes get Remembered,

But Legends never die...

- Babe Ruth-

Who are you when im not looking ?

“Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.”
 - Dr. Seuss -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xXD9-1mLBY

  On the inside I know what I really want.

 I know what my values are.

 My ambition must not get in in the way.
Around me, things are falling apart;
 within me,
 they're falling together.

I've learned when you don’t understand your emotions;
you have only a limited capacity for self-respect,
 and you don’t have healthy relationships with people.

It's interesting the stories that we make up about who we are,
what we’re capable of, and what’s achievable or not.

The big question then becomes,
 how can we change our state of mind when not maximizing our true potential?

Tony Robbins poses an interesting question......
The toughest thing about chasing your dreams is managing the disciplines of persistent action and hopeful patience that are required to ultimately see the vision come to be.
This is an area of huge tension.
 How do dream chasers manage that tension and thrive?

After an exhausting weekend with the former Mikki Buckland,
 it is definitely time to move on.
In a book I read called The Energy Bus it talks about people like Mikki.
They're called Energy Vampires !!!

As human "beings" we all make mistakes...

We'd all do things differently......

 had we known then what we know now.

 What matters now is what you do now.

Let go of guilt. Let go of shame. Let go of blame.

This is "being" in the moment.

This is an empowered human being—the empowered YOU.

-Mike Klinger-

The Disentigration of Conscience

Conscience is an aptitude, faculty, intuition or judgment of the intellect.
It distinguishes right from wrong.
 In psych terms, 
conscience causes feelings of remorse when one commits actions that go against 
 moral values, rectitude or integrity.

Commonly used metaphors for conscience include:
 the "voice within" and the "inner light"^.

Often small events in life that turn out to be the catalyst for transformation.
Some times your struggle and search will lead to your passion.
When finding and living your life passion, you need a logical plan of action.

I love those who can smile in trouble,
 who can gather strength from distress,
and grow brave by reflection.
 'Tis the business of little minds to shrink,
 but they whose heart is firm,
and whose conscience approves their conduct,
 will pursue their principles unto death.

-Leonardo Davinci-

To begin creating your own better self, you must learn to balance

 your head and your heart. 

 Relying on your heart to inform your thoughts will force you to evolve.

Baby steps..... Small acts can do the job.

Grand gestures and acts of heroism are not necessary to achieve this.

Give yourself permission to express emotions.

 Alot of times I'm accused of being passive aggressive because I do this. 

When you express emotions such as anger, sadness, guilt,

 or shame you're are perceived to be negative..... or weak.

In communicating your emotions, it’s not only about the words you say.

Your intention is also extremely important.

 Be careful that you are not expecting the other person to make you feel better.

This often leads to anger, frustration, and disappointment.

Martial Arts vs Bullying

Violence in any form implies a loss of self-control. 

Joe Lewis taught us,
martial arts instructors reinforce behavior codes that are about acquiring an attitude of self-control. 
 The last stronghold of maintaining a non-violent society lies with the
martial arts industry.

Wisdom is knowing what to do next;

Skill is knowing how to do it,

 and Courage is doing it.

-Joe Lewis-

Not ......a Muse

The Muses (Ancient Greek: Μοῦσαι, moũsai:^[1in Greek mythology, poetry, and literature, are the goddesses of the inspiration of literature, science and the arts.
They were considered the source of the knowledge,related orally for centuries in the ancient culture that was contained in poetic lyrics and myths.

 A teacher affects eternity;

 he can never tell where his influence stops.
- Henry Adams-

 Think of someone who has charisma or impact.

 Have you noticed.....?
 They have an abundance of spiritual, emotional, or physical energy.                
   They project and receive it !!!!
Every successful person brings a different style of energy into their environment.
Success is derived from your passion.

Communicate with intensity from your heart.

 I experienced the most inspiring moments and lessons during time spent

 in parking lots, restaurants and car rides with my friend and mentor Joe Lewis.

 I care not what others think of what I do,

 but I care very much about what I think of what I do!

That is character!

  Theodore Roosevelt

You should expect support and encouragement from people that are close to you.
REMEMBER

Life is short, it's disheartening to have people around you that discourage you.

Do you really want to waste your time feeling down over others words or opinions ?

I recently changed sales teams........I'm still a 'road warrior',

 but my real job is now something I'm happy and look forward to doing.

 For the first time in along time I love sales again....yup, you heard that right,

I LOVE MY JOB 

A lot of people go through the motions in life, not doing what they love.

 They end up constantly looking back, asking themselves,

 What if ?

Whether people support you or not,

 Follow your heart, and not the words of others just to live up to their expectations.

Your LOVE is the most important thing in your life.

Tony Robbins says......

Great leaders are purpose driven. They know not only what to do,

but why they are doing it and are able to help others tap into the power of WHY.

The more you can share the driving purpose behind an outcome or activity,

the more you enable your team to tap into what they desire, believe, or value.

This produces greater team performance and makes you a more effective leader.

The Arguement of Virtue

Virtue (Latin: virtus, Ancient Greek: ἀρετή "arete") is moral excellence. A virtue is a positive trait or quality deemed to be morally good and thus is valued as a foundation of principle and good moral being. Personal virtues are characteristics valued as promoting collective and individual greatness. The opposite of virtue is vice.

How many times have you met or been influenced by someone who portrayed themselves as one thing but truly was the opposite ?
Sometimes I wonder where the lies stop and the truth begins...
In our martial arts training we should gain an awareness that everything is not as it appears
 and our emotions will invariably deceive us.

Prepare for this in life and in the street........
When all hell is breaking loose, your capacity to find your center, and to help yourself and others to find answers, comes down to your ability to direct and manage emotions.

 Extraordinary and effective leaders
bring certainty into uncertain environments.

-Tony Robbins-

 Whether it be in sports, business, or even a great parent,
  people are drawn to those who’ve found an internal certainty to guide them.
 That certainty is not that you as a leader have all the answers,
 but rather that there’s certainty inside you that,
 together with your team, you can find the answer and move forward.

I think instructors should do more risk-tolerance drills,

 such as working on stress management,

fear stabilization,

 frustration and helplessness manipulation,

 and other aspects of training which deal with mind-sets,

attitudes and focus.

-Joe Lewis-

Take up a full contact sport.
Boxing, Ice Hockey, Muay Thai, Kickboxing, MMA, Wrestling

 You won't become fearless, but that's a good thing,
 the other word for fearless is stupid.

 But you will become more accepting of pain and less scared of it,
less concerned when people are planning to hurt you
 and happier to do something about it.

In life as it is on the ring.....
Events will occur that cause us to think negatively about our circumstances or ourselves.
  Don't dwell on the past or create angst trying to control the future.
  When we over-think our lives, we effectively stop the universal flow.

Do not abandon the warrior arts of the past.
 Absorb venerable traditions of the old ways into this Art by clothing them with fresh garments,
 and building on the classic styles to create better forms.

-Morihei Ueshiba-
 (The founder of Aikido)

Blinded by our Passion

 

In our desperation not to face our challenges
 we tend to hide behind people and things

 all the while knowing
 it's much easier to face them head on
 than to run and hide.

We were given hearts to love and be loved,

 sometimes they break.

 

Over time they mend,

the way to mend a broken heart is to love more than ever.

There are people who touch our lives trying to break us down,

but everyone who touches our lives is a teacher.

Trust, like respect is earned not just given.

 The road back to trust and respect is not an easy one.

 It is paved by taking chances, letting someone in,

 giving them a chance to love the hurt away

and reignite our passion.

Some will hurt or disappoint us anyway.

We need the courage to persevere, 

taking every chance to find our passion.

One day someone or something will touch our life,

 inspiring us with their willingness to give us more love,

 more passion than we ever thought we had to give in return.

-Denise Lora Webster Davis-

 ('Sissy') holding her daddy Joe Lewis' hand as he died. 

 

Our passion is sometimes 'birthed' in tragedy.

 

People are always blaming their circumstances,

for what they are.

 

 I don’t believe in circumstances.

 

The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want,

and if they can’t find them, make them.

 

 ~George Bernard Shaw-

 

Find mentors and get advice when pursuing your dreams.

Mentors and pain birth your dreams.
-Dr Mike Murdock-

 Don’t place too much value on family and friends advice.
 Though  well intentioned they're
 advice is more often than not.....wrong for you. 

Draw the line with friends or with an ex
 who's too emotionally needy.

 Professional/personal setbacks feel like the end of the world.
 They don't mean you’ve failed.

 It  means you’re forging a new path.

Joe Lewis said,

 We need to sense whether we've  been motivated by fear

or by confidence.

 One will lead you to being the martial artist you admire,

 the other will lead you to avoid challenges

 by allowing you to continue to hide in fear of being exposed.

 

Feelings are the keys to our motivation and our desires.

 Our spirit is our energy and our pathway.

 Our mentors and/or instructors are our guides and our escorts.